Writing in Anger

Sometimes I need to take my anger along and write.

It's the only way I won't lie.

Being human I am mostly writing in the sauce of my emotions. Why does writing a post while being angry feel like a bigger deal than doing the same while being bored, joyful, peaceful or sad? I am not sure any of those would have inspired a separate headline.

Anger is not a favourite. It is heavily controlled and selectively tolerated.

We often filter it out when going about our day or overlay it with other feelings, which aren't always feelings, since what we feel is anger. We try to cover up the heat, not to be the fire.

We mess with the congruency of where we are versus what we want to broadcast into the world. Imagine your brain trying to send the signal to your muscles to conjure up a smile and keep your tone friendly to not alarm those around you while your whole body is screaming 'aaaargh'. Those receiving this input then try to reverse-engineer what their body picks up as tension, but is presented as happy, friendly, or fine.

While we pretend that this works for us we are burning up inside and confused.

Our bodies know what is going on. Body-knowing is knowing.

Anger is not violence. Anger is not hate. Anger is not apathy. Although these can all occur at the same time or in connection with anger, anger can stand on its own. It is something to reckon with and it will not by-pass us and our bodies.

What if we didn't have to lie about anger? I am angry.

What if we could be loved while angry? I am scared.

What if we could be corrected when angry? I am sorry.

What if anger was just another emotion we got to bring to work, to our relationships, to our world? What could we learn about expressing anger in ways that honour it, that honour us and each other?

What would we see if we let anger be anger?